Jessica Simpson Hooks Up With Gerard Butler?

In the sex-recycling ways of Hollywood, this rumored coupling is inevitable but oh-so-uninspiring. Jessica Simpson and Gerard Butler have reportedly been hooking up at NYC’s Soho House, “laughing and flirting” together (although alongside Jess’s sidekick hairdresser Ken Paves. Awkward!).

Although the plain-speaking Scot and airheaded Texan would seem to have little in common, they’re already connected by his rumored ex Jennifer Aniston who dated John Mayer who dated Jess. So they’ve practically done it already! [Photo: WENN]

Manhattan’s Hammerstein Ballroom was glittering last night—and it wasn’t just the reflection off Spike Lee’s hat. Alicia Keys and a very pregnant Padma Lakshmi hosted Keep A Child Alive’s 6th Annual Black Ball last night, entertaining a room full of stars with musical assistance from John Mayer and Chris Martin. Among the celebs in attendance were Usher, David Bowie, Iman, Adrien Grenier, Nick Cannon and Halle Berry, whose sequined, cut-crazy dress fit right in with Spike’s hat. Watch them all hobnob in the gallery below.

[Photo: Getty Images]

Oh, not this again. OK! Magazine says John Mayer has been leaving his former Friends star-with-benefits Jennifer Aniston “flirty texts, phone calls, and romantic requests.” Did he leave a CD in her wonderland or something? E!’s insider says “Jen and John? That’s just not happening again. Ever,” but doesn’t actually contradict the story. After all, what would stop a cad like John from making half-hearted sexy talk to an alienated ex just for his personal entertainment? Let’s say he’s chilling with some young pick-up after a long day at the studio. “Hey, John. Did you really date Jennifer Aniston?” “Yeah, I hit that. Want me to call her right now and prove it?” We’ve all seen his comedy bits—you know he’s done worse (legal note: we do not actually know if he has done this, let alone something worse).

Then again, karma may be rearing its ugly head on John. Kristin Cavallari, who we bet would get a big kick out of pranking Aniston, told Ryan Seacrest this week that she once spurned Mayer—remember his “I never high-fived her with my penis” twit?—because she didn’t want to be “another notch on his belt.” That E! source says Mayer wouldn’t be bummed by “someone from The Hills turning him down,” but that only goes to show how little he cares about what the ladies think. Block him, Jennifer! He’s trouble!

[Photo: Getty Images]

We have long since stopped envying the billions of celebrity women who’ve passed through John Mayer’s revolving bedroom door, and now his latest quote has made us even more grossed out. “I have great balance and co-ordination. Inventiveness. I am a very inventive lover - that’s the secret to my success,” he’s reportedly said.

Blee! Now we’re just picturing how he “inventively” shagged Cameron Diaz, Jennifer Aniston, Mandy Moore, Jessica Simpson… and we wish we weren’t. [Photo: WENN]

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Is Kristin Cavallari’s body a wonderland? John Mayer claims not to know. The rumor yesterday was that Mayer and Cavallari hooked up and were secretly dating, but Mayer took to his Twitter to set the record straight.

In a series of tweets, Mayer wrote, “Rumor control: How do I put this like a gentleman…I have never high fived Kristin Cavalari with my penis…I’m sure she’s a wonderful gal but we have never tasted the Skittles Rainbow together…My Milli has never slam danced with her Vanilli…I have never Bensoned her Hedges, nor have I attempted to Bartle her James.”

How poetic. Remind us again why so many people have dated this guy? [Photo: GettyImages]

TheFABlife has scored tickets to Michael Jackson’s memorial in Los Angeles, and we’re teaming up with PopEater to live blog the event. Our blogger, Libby Keatinge, will be twittering from the front row of the Staples Center. Participate in our live blog now while watching the live stream above.

The memorial includes performances by Mariah Carey, Jennifer Hudson, Usher, Stevie Wonder, John Mayer and Smokey Robinson. Plus, the Rev. Al Sharpton and Martin Luther King III will eulogizing the King of Pop.

Related Content: Full Michael Jackson coverage from PopEater.

Jennifer Love Hewitt, who has dated more than two dozen men, is writing a book about love and dating called The Day I Shot Cupid. We’re not sure whether her very active — unstable, some might say — romantic life makes her qualified to give dating advice. Or whether it should disqualify her. Of the book, she says:

“Throughout my career, there has always been so much written about my love life. Some true, but mostly made up. I thought it was time to share the real story of what I’ve learned navigating the dating waters. Hopefully, in addition to having a good laugh, women reading this will learn from some of my hard lessons.”

Hard lessons? What hard lessons? Could the gorgeous ghost whisperer be referring to dating the Johns (Cusack and Mayer) or Enrique Iglesias, all of whom are notorious male sluts playboys? Or maybe she’s talking about dating Shaggy. (You remember, he’s the one that released “It Wasn’t Me,” about how men should cheat and deny everything if caught. We’d have to guess that getting engaged to actor Ross McCall only to call the whole thing off would make the list of lessons learned.

Come to think of it, this book has the potential to be super juicey. Amazon.com, here we come! [Photo: Getty Images]

Katy Perry was playing “Shoot, Shag Or Marry” on Australian radio when she confessed a crush on everyone’s favorite fame whore. “I couldn’t marry John Mayer, it’d be so intense. I’d definitely shag the s— out of him though. I’ll go on record saying that.” (Pete Wentz got the ring and Benji Madden got the bullet, in case you were wondering.)

Sex but no commitment? Big breasts and fond of the photo op? Sounds like John’s dream girl! Travis McCoy might want to keep an eye on Perry’s twitter. Mayer—one of only 16 people she follows on the service—is about to light that thang up.

[Photos: Splash News Online]

John Mayer is tired of you thinking he’s a douche. Not because it hurts his feelings, but because it shows an ignorance of Hollywood history. Yesterday the singer took to his Twitter to lay it out for us.

Long before “douches” and “famewhores” there were these people called “showbiz types.” “Showbiz types” are people who grew up talking to themselves alone in a room for hours until they found some sort of outlet. Once they found that outlet, everything fell into place, except for the fact that they still never worked out why they still talk so much.

So you see, though filled with deep emotional voids that can never be filled, Showbiz Types are an important part of our Nation’s tapestry. I’m a Showbiz Type. (cue penny whistle and marching drums) But I am not a douche!! (of 1,090,466, seventeen stand and applaud wildly)

What do you think? Do all the wry twitters, creepy pick-up lines, easy waitresses, obnoxious videos and Rolling Stone cover-girls in Mayer’s world show him to be a douchey fame whore or just your average Showbiz Type? We’re sure he’d like to know!

We’re guessing this is a case of a no-name singer trying to get some press, but still we don’t doubt her claim! Jessie James (a brunette country singer, apparently) is accusing John Mayer of texting her after a party with the bizarre line, “Let me tuck you in.” Here’s what she said in a recent radio interview:

“He had someone send for me [from] across the room. He had a bunch of girls with him and he said, ‘We should [all] go back to my apartment.’ We were all hanging out and everyone started to gradually leave. It was just he and I at this point. I told him, ‘I need some taxi money, I’m gonna go home now.’ He texted me throughout the entire night while I was at the hotel room, leaving messages like, ‘Let me tuck you in. I want to see you.’”

The move didn’t work on James, but lucky for Mayer, Jennifer Aniston was totally down with being tucked into bed. Sweet dreams, ladies!  [Photo: WireImage]